Sidney Catherine

Girls. I have two girls. For the past week and a half I've been getting used to that phrase. "Oh, the girls are doing great." I just love it! When we first realized Sidney was a girl I was completely exhausted from her delivery and it hadn't really sunk in until later on that day. But now, we're elated to have two little girls.

Sidney was born on Sunday morning at 7:50am. I was about 37 1/2 weeks pregnant. The day before I had been in labor all day. My contractions started on Saturday around 5am and around 9am they got to be 5 minutes apart. Since Weslyn was born in about 9 hours from when my contractions began, our doctor was very adamant about us getting to the hospital sooner rather than later since labor and deliveries after your first one tend to be shorter. Also, with my complication we knew we needed to be at the hospital if anything were to go wrong. So we sent Weslyn to Gigi and G'daddy's house for the weekend and headed to the hospital. Well, Saturday was a long day. We stayed at the hospital, walking the halls for 9 hours. My contractions slowed down and almost completely went away by 8pm. We decided to pull the plug and get discharged so we could sleep in the comfort of our own home. I went into the hospital that day 3-4 cm dilated and I left 4-5 cm. After 9 hours, I knew that I needed rest and something to eat! On our way home we stopped for a Jimmy John's sub (best sandwich ever after not eating all day) and then headed to bed. I didn't have any contractions the whole night. I think the Lord knew I needed to get my sleep to prepare me for the next morning. I woke up again at 5am with contractions. 10 min apart, very regular. I went ahead and took a shower and Lawton made me breakfast. By 6:30am we were ready to go and my contractions were more intense and 5 min apart. We got to the hospital at 7am and when I got to my room, I hit the hard part of labor. I felt out of control with intense pain and I was 10 cm dilated. I was floored. How could I go from 5 to 10 cm in that short amount of time?! I didn't care, I just wanted to deliver this baby pronto. After more intense contractions the baby's heart rate was going up and down and the nurses all had concerned looks on their faces. I took some oxygen and had to take deep breathes to try to get her heart rate regulated. After one push we could see the cord was wrapped around her neck. My doctor cut it from her neck and after two more pushes she was out at 7:50am. I felt so much relief, but was getting pretty concerned when they called the neonatal doctor to come. My little girl was blue and not breathing. It was the longest 10-15 seconds of our lives. That first cry brought me to tears as they handed her over to me and called off the neonatal team. Lawton and I looked at each other with amazement and I said, "What are we going to do with TWO girls?" :)

This pregnancy had it's highs and lows. Being on bed rest for 3 months after a placental abruption was a long and difficult process, but we had the most incredible support anyone could ask for. Our family, friends and church stepped up to take care of us throughout the entire 3 months. People watched Weslyn for us, cooked meals and most of all, prayed. People prayed a lot. Not just for the baby, but for all of us. They prayed I wouldn't worry and that I would trust the Lord. They prayed Lawton would have enough energy to be both mommy and daddy when I couldn't do my job. They prayed Weslyn would learn to be patient and content to be at home most days. If there's anything I've learned throughout the process, it's that prayer is powerful. It's not just requests we make to God. It's an act of selflessness which takes time out of our day to do for someone else. It humbles us to see that we can't do it on our own and it brings up to a mindset of submission and recognition that we are not in control. It's no wonder Jesus spent so much time in prayer to the Father.

After a difficult pregnancy and a scary delivery, I've come to the conclusion that the Lord has made Sidney to be a fighter for sure. I'm so excited to see what's to come for her life and to see how her personality will develop. Right now, she's a sleepy, hungry baby with a big sister who adores her. The last week and a half has been so great. I've had help from Lawton and his mom non-stop. There have only been two short times when I've been alone with the girls. My help is nearing the end in a couple days, but I think "the girls" and I are ready to take on our days with just the three of us...Kobe too:) It's been such a blessing to have so much support and I couldn't be more thankful. Sidney, you are dearly loved! Thank you to all of you who have been apart of this process. We can't wait for everyone to meet Sidney!

The whole family minus Kobe. Weslyn holding the Mickey Mouse that Sidney gave her. 

Weslyn giving Sidney her first lovie from big sister.

Proud daddy with both girls.

Headed home!

Weslyn constantly wants to hold Sidney and says, "Her so tiny! I tiny too!" 

We started bottles earlier this time around.
 Hoping she takes to it so this momma can get out some. :)

Talking about being a big sister.

All she wants to do is give her kisses.
I'm totally fine with that, as I'm sure that will change in the next few years:)

Daddy and Weslyn have spent a lot of quality time together.
This girl is going to be so sad when Daddy goes back to work!

Kobe has even had a fair amount of attention. Walks, bath and a haircut!

Welcome to the family Sidney! We're so excited to have you home.

Maternity & Family Photos

My sister is so talented. I'm a photographer's worst nightmare because of how uncooperative I can be during a photo session. Lynn is so patient with me and can help me look better in any light. She also keeps me from looking totally cheesy, which is how I always feel when I'm getting my picture taken.

We took these photos at my in-laws house in Jacksonville, Florida. These photos are so special to me not only because my sister took them, but also because this pregnancy has been particularly difficult. I've been on bed rest for a three months and things are now starting to look up the sooner I get to my due date. Lynn was able to capture some sweet moments with my little girl and of course include our #1..Kobe:)

Thank you, sissy!

Big thanks to Gdaddy for keeping this little girl entertained for the photo session:)

Love you Lynn!!

I Need You.

Weslyn still hasn't figured out the difference between needing something and wanting something. "I need lotion"..."I need your tools, Daddy"..."I need Momma's phone"... "I need my toy"... "I need a cheese stick." These are just a few among many "needs" she has on a daily basis. Really, anything we have in our hands at any given moment she feels like she "needs" as well. We're slowly teaching her the difference between needing something and wanting something. She's starting to get it and request, "I would like" instead of "I need."

I've been learning the difference too. I think for the longest time I've wanted God in my life. I've made daily decisions to want more of Him, to want Him involved. I'm not convinced I can honestly say I've felt like I need God at all times. There are definitely times I do need God that I can give examples of from my past. For the most part, when times are good, I think I've only made an effort to want God in my life. This explains a lot of things. My prayer life isn't the greatest, I rely so much on my own strengths and my emotions get the best of me...a lot. I have control issues and I'm incredibly stubborn. That's probably a lot more than you want to know, but it's the truth I'm discovering about myself right now.

This past week has been one of the most difficult weeks of my life. I'm beginning to realize my need for God every day, every hour, every moment. Not only come to the realization, but surrender to it. I've had a friend teach me this through her struggle. She's had an incredible need for God this week and has really relied on Him for all of her strength. She's been the example I need to show me how much I need God at all times. I need His grace so much because my sin runs that deep.

I need God if I want to be a better mother, wife and friend. I need God if I want to be used in my church. I need God if I want to be used in the lives of the ones I love. Without Him, I mess up in all of these areas. I'm so glad He loves me enough and freely offers Himself to me everyday, every hour and every moment.